At least today, what do I hope to achieve in each moment of life? It’s a pretty big fucking question considering my acute awareness that I’ll probably die within thirty years. Ironically, it’s also an empty one:

I really don’t beleive in legacy or accomplishment because they ultimately have no meaning. Yet I constantly ponder my movement through time towards the future, and a comfort zone where I might look back to find some satisfaction with my past actions. Maybe this kind of thinking is a natural safety mechanism, my mind attempting to minimize the residual regret I’ll have in the future for inaction today — or maybe I’m just wasting my life with these thoughts.

Regardless, between the three of us we only have one hundred birthdays. And now that I’m at least capable of facing that truth, what am I going to do with them?